Self-Talk

Unless there is something really pressing in the news I think weekends will be generally dedicated to personal growth and development topics, humor, or just random rants. I might also limit myself to one post on the weekend to give myself a day off. There will be gaps as well if I’m too busy with other projects although I’ll probably make a quick comment as long as I have internet access each day.

Today I want to mention a book that was recommended to me a few months ago (thanks Dawn) around how we can reprogram our own thinking about ourselves. I just finished it last Friday.

I’ve had a number of friends discussing this topic in a general sense lately and it seems like a good one to share. The best thing for me has been how they have tried to give me some perspective on who I am in the world – that can be a very difficult thing to see. I guess it’s similar to a “can’t see the forest for the trees” type of problem. I really appreciate friends like that who help me see some of those truths instead of the goofy lies that run through my head. I think everyone has a number of those they tell themselves.

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The book is What to Say When you Talk To Yourself by Shad Helmstetter. Part of the description of the book probably describes the problem it addresses better than I can. “We all talk to ourselves all of the time, usually without realizing it. And most of what we tell ourselves is negative, counterproductive and damaging, preventing us from enjoying a fulfilled and successful life.”

I’ll give you the core idea although I think the book is a must read. We tend to get trapped in being effective and growing because we are always in a conversation in our heads that “I’m not ________ enough to do that, I could never _________, who am I kidding, there’s no way I could _______” and so on. Before we even try to change ourselves, take on new goals, or accomplish tasks we often cripple ourselves if not outright doom ourselves to failure because of that little voice that keeps cropping up.

So why don’t we try to change the message of that voice? What if we could start having it tell us what we are capable of doing and letting it drive us to succeed and exceed what we thought was possible? The author makes a very convincing argument that it can be done and gives directions on how to change that voice and our subsequent thinking and gives the rationale for how it works from a psychological standpoint.

If you decide to tackle something like this I’d love to hear stories of what is happening, as would other people who read this. I think it could be very motivational. However, if you want to keep it private, I understand that as well. But be bold if you are up to it. Post some comments. Let everyone know what you are planning to do to change yourself and your life. Most importantly, let us know the results.

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